#at this point i dont even want to remember
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i was homeschooled by a neo nazi. the sheer amount of damage it did to my psyche as a queer child in that environment is something im still grappling with to this day. and thats to say nothing about having my education, health, and emotional wellbeing neglected. i had to fucking laugh in 2020 when people were crying about not leaving the house for a single month, when i had been kept housebound since i was 6 years old. i cant describe the indignity of watching people finally recognize what id been saying for years, which is that remote learning was not only useless as an education method but fundamentally damaging to the students mental health, and then not ONCE think to check up on kids who'd already been homeschooled. not once.
because nobody gives a flying shit about the actual voices of homeschooled kids, least of all the parents that subject them to it. and thats not to say those parents dont care, or arent attached - quite the opposite. remember, we're talking about the kind of abuse that seeks to keep the victims closer, not further away. its just that the pressure to cover for that abuse is placed directly on these childrens shoulders. i know, because i lived it. we are expected to present ourselves to the public as prodigies, partly to sell people on the idea of homeschooling but mainly to ward off social services. and if we fail to do that, which we largely do, we are kept out of the public eye our entire childhoods.
and thats assuming it ends with the onset of adulthood. if we're lucky enough to have parents willing to let us go at all, that isolation and lack of worldly experience leaves us with no resources, no networks, no support systems, no basic survival skills. do you know the difference between debit and credit? what health insurance is, who pays for it, how to find a provider? who taught you to drive? do you know what the dmv is? what social security is, or where to find your birth certificate? do you know how to use a crosswalk? if you arent homeschooled, you do not realize how much knowledge you have that you take for granted. the level of dependance it creates on the abuser is terrifying. im 21, i didnt move out till 6 months ago. most people assume i took an extended gap year. the truth is i was psychotic from isolation trauma, rapidly developing stockholm syndrome, and had no resources to leave after i turned 18 even though i desparately wanted to. if i hadnt been lucky enough to have other family members to rescue me, i would probably not be alive today.
and despite how damning the evidence is that this is a terrible byproduct of multiple systems that long since shouldve been fixed, despite all the hubub about protecting children in this stupid, stupid fucking country, there is ZERO public interest in acknowledgeing our existence outside of using us as a talking point to snub rural america. a talking point, and nothing more. nobody actually cares to change those red states, they just want someone to blame. so when we do speak up, we get tuned out. because it turns out nobody actually wants to hear about the medical neglect, or the cults, or the grooming, or the domestic violence, let alone do anything about it. (besides vaguely gesturing to things like...calling CPS on our own parents, once again placing the pressure on the victims to rescue ourselves, when weve often been taught to fear those institutions since the onset of our abuse.)
if you think im exaggerating, go read through r/homeschoolrecovery. thats just the kids whove managed to get internet, most of whom profess terror at facing further abuse if their parents find out. look at your phone. look at your computer. every single device you own has the ability to set parental controls. i dont know the exact numbers of the silent majority of homeschooled children without access to the internet, but considering the main demographic who chooses homeschooling is white supremacist christian fundie cults, who really fucking love having numbers of white babies that exceed the double digits, id be confident in wagering its a lot. so you wanna know why over half the states in the country are red? fucking start there.
because theres a *reason* isolation is a cult tactic. its why im such an advocate for libraries, unpaywalled and un age restricted internet, and actually putting money into rural infrastructure - ESPECIALLY internet networks and public transit. because while the american public education system remains the stinking garbage fire it is, people are gonna keep choosing to take matters into their own hands. and under this presidency, it is going to get worse. there is no point bashing the parents for it, because it just convinces them further that the left has an agenda to systemically brainwash their kids or whatever. so please, for the love of god, make sure that even in the worst case scenarios where they have complete control over their children, those kids arent completely cut off from the world.
Anyway enough lame gifted kid discourse we are in our 20s. Let's talk about how homeschooling in america should be fucking illegal it's insane lol
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Im unable to go to school for art, bc my parents cant afford it and my family in general wouldnt be too supportive of it (I live with them)
I dont mind that, I still do art as a hobby, but it kind of hurts. I like what I am in college for actually, but I just love art
Is there a way to better my art while not having the tools art students have? I dont care if its harder, I would just like hope :/
hi !! so i can totally relate to this
i did not grow up with a wealthy family, i got into my highschool (which was a specialty art highschool) thru application. After that, i was kind of lost with art education. I had no money to go to a big art school, so i did community college.
here is what my art looked like in highschool
However, that was kind of a waste. It was pretty much a repeat of what i learned in highschool and to be honest the entire time i was in highschool i didnt improve at ALL. not one bit. This continued into college. In fact i didnt improve at all in college either except for the times i took a gap.
as of this point in the timeline my art looked like this
now i havent been in college now for a couple years, and let me tell you my art has gotten the biggest improvement ive ever seen. Hell i didnt even finish school, I owe money and cant return until i pay it. But honestly ? its hard to find the motivation.
What im getting at is all of my improvement has been done thru my own means. School did not help me improve. And everything you learn in art school can easily be found online via videos and tutorials.
So what made me improve so much out of school ? Honestly ? Passion. I hated being told what to do, I always have. I do not like cookie cutter assignments, boring studies, all of the subjects that are rinsed and repeated every semester. I stopped caring, and during the last bit of time i was in school, I went to my professor. I said I didn’t care, I hated the assignments, I had no desire. You know what she told me ? To ignore them then. She pushed me to make what i WANTED to make, she made assignments specifically for me, she gave me full creative freedom. THATS WHEN I IMMEDIATELY IMPROVED. School isnt what helped me, what helped me is being given an environment where i could be passionate and raw and make art i wanted to make. And you dont need thousands of dollars and a studio to make that happen.
You don’t need those tools. And remember, when it comes to art school, its never the students who are naturally talented or only have technical skill that succeed, its the ones that give a shit. the ones who love art, who love to create, and have a story to tell.
one you realize that it gets so much better.
Anyways, as a last update, heres my art now that im out of school and doing my own thing
#sorry im sappy#im really passionate about art#its everything to me and i have strong opinioms#in another life i am an art professor#i just want to share my passion with others#i hope this was helpful at least a bit#do not hesitate to dm me if you need more advice#ask#artist#my art#artwork#art#digital art#artists on tumblr#illustration#original art#digital artist#digital drawing#art process#art school
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c.b.g. - hang around by echosmith (it's like you were tailor-made for me)
song: hang around by echosmith (listen)
-- in which beomgyu thinks he might be a little too much for you. god forbid you'll ever make him think that.
genre: slight angst, fluff/comfort
note: i just love beomgyu so much guys he's my bias u dont understand he deserves to be held and loved and praised all the time i love him sm hhhhhhh 🥹 let him be his silly self he's so cutehsakjdhakdaskd
✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦
“You were never this naughty before!” Yeonjun pointed out, casting an accusatory glare at the man beside you. Meanwhile, the man in question - your boyfriend, was doubled over in laughter, blindly reaching out to hold on to your shoulders while he gasped into your hair. You stood, grinning mischievously at Yeonjun.
“Hey,” you said playfully, “I’m exactly the same as before I met you guys!”
“Not after becoming his girlfriend, though,” Yeonjun glared at Beomgyu, who was now peeking at him from behind you, still shaking with laughter. You could feel him shuddering on your back. “Now give me back my sweater! I have a date!”
You gave in and pulled the clothing from behind your back, but Beomgyu whined. Well, you still were not as cheeky as him yet, but you reluctantly tossed it at Yeonjun. The older boy made a face at you both before moving to his bedroom.
Beomgyu collapsed in laughter on the couch, clapping his hands together like a seal. He enjoyed getting a rouse out of annoying his roommates, a naughty boy indeed, but his joy was contagious. You began to giggle again until it turned to a full-blown laughter.
You both had calmed down the minute Yeonjun shut the front door. Sighing, Beomgyu leaned his body into yours, nuzzling his face in your neck. The next few minutes were spent wrapped in silence, save for the whirring of the fan and distant rumbling of rubber tyres on asphalt.
You're just what the doctor ordered for me You're one of a kind, yeah, I can barely believe It's like you were tailor-made for me I don't even mind that I've been losing my sleep
You felt Beomgyu’s fingers curl around your own, and you reciprocated the action.
“Am I that much of a bad influence?” he asked quietly, breath tickling your skin.
You scoffed, thinking it sounded a bit like a silly thing to be worried about, but followed it with a gentle smile. You knew he couldn’t see it while his face was hidden in your shoulder, but you spoke softly to reassure him, “Don’t take what they say so seriously. They’re harmless pranks, you know that.”
Beomgyu hummed, as if he was thinking, but somehow not yet convinced.
“It’s not something that’ll put us in the depths of hell, oh my god, just, probably in Yeonjun’s wrath.”
“They’re the same thing.” He was pouting when he raised his head to look at you.
“Then find someone else to annoy other than Yeonjun.”
His face morphed into a sneaky grin, he lifted his head to look into your eyes, “You?”
Silence.
Before you let escape the giggle you’ve been holding in, you caught the anxiety dancing around in Beomgyu’s eyes.
“Just kidding! I don’t want you to get annoyed at me.” He quickly draped his arm around your shoulders to pull you close. You melted when he pressed his plush lips against your temple, like he always did when he thought you were the slightest bit irritated at him.
It didn’t take much for you to remember how he used to appease his ex the same way, except back then, his eyes were always glossy with fear.
If you're like a fire then I'm pouring gasoline I just wanna hang around If I'm like an earthquake, you see past the fault in me I just wanna hang around
It killed you a little bit whenever you caught his actions, so you surprised him with a kiss on the lips. Beomgyu, although taken aback, leaned into the kiss, thumb caressing your waist. Physical touch was something he typically initiated, not you. Suddenly, he felt like soaring.
“What was that for?”
“For your adorable ass.” You raised his hand to press another kiss to it, “You’re never annoying, Gyu. You’re never too much. I love you.”
Beomgyu’s eyes were glossy once more, but for a different reason. The anxiety disappeared into nothingness, but something brighter shone in him when he heard those three words.
✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦
a/n: this was originally written with a different song, but i figured this fits the narrative the most c: i interpret it as beomgyu's pov, he's happy he met reader and how she can see past things he thinks is aura points loss for himself lmao c: cutest cutest cuTEST GRR
#choi beomgyu fluff#choi beomgyu angst#choi beomgyu x reader#tomorrow by together#txt fluff#txt#txt angst#beomgyu x reader#beomgyu fluff#beomgyu angst#hyabbstay songfics
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Watched arcane season 2 act 1, thought abt it, so here are some of my thoughts in no particular order. Obvious spoilers.
Also, i watched in dub. Important to know when i am quoting charaters + when i am talking about their tone.
Starting of with something that is directly affected by dub — ukrainian Jayce is my Jayce. Ppl said he sounded condesending while talking to Ekko — not. at. alllll. true for my Jayce. My Jayce sounded tired, emotionaly burn out. "You drink tea, Ekko?" said with no though to it, in a context of continues talking of "Haha do i live here? Hahah....... Do you guys want tea? Want some tea? I'll make tea. Do you drink tea, Ekko?". But d-dub is supposed to stay true to the original— I DONT CAREEE. I love my blorbo almost-himbo Jayce, never changing his characterisation in my mind.
And i will hold Jayce's hand when i say this — you were. Just so gay for like... Essentialy going "Are you okay? Good, good" to lady Mel Medarda HERSELF and then seeing Victor and losing your mind. Sprinting with him in your hands to your lab. LIVING in your lab to monitor him. I just... I get it, you don't have many friends. But like...... Really dude. Reaally.
Give Mel and Ekko thirty minutes. I promise you they would work it out. Eternal piece would be achieved.
I know there are a lot of different opinions regarding Caitlyn. I will not be explaining in-depts what i think about her acr, because a) who cares and b) i like to see her go cray-cray. But like — why isnt anybody exept for Vi attempting to stop her??? Like why is Jayce mourning Victor's twink death instead of, yk, stopping his childhood-best-friend-kinda-younger-sister from killing ppl of Zaun, the last thing Victor wants btw? She and Vi are twenty-ish — WHYYYY are they going through it by themselves??? Why doesnt baby yoda guy with German name that i dont dare to write trying to stop the daughtrer of his ex-collegue? He is 600 or something, im sure he could've come up with advice.
Cait pointing her gun at a child is terrifying, it opens up the possibilities of her going even more blinded with anger, doing even more horrific things, and Vi is right to try and stop her. However... I know damn right i would've believe her when she said she will not miss 😭 Every single time she fired her gun she was very precise. Even in that scene she aimed at the gun the girl was holding like two seconds ago and got a perfect. fucking. score. Like i dont remember her missing at all, actually.
"Ohhhhh you're gonnnaaa haaaaaattteeee Maddie after act two—" says who? On that note, i hope both Cait AND Vi will sleep with a few random people. Good for them. Let them try to forget about each other only to realise just how down bad they are for one another. Let the scenes of Cait and Maddie hooking up intertwine with Vi's one night stand.
"Maddie is just gonna be a victim of comander Cait :(((" and i do not have any thing to say to that — we dont yet KNOW what will happen — but I dont think Cait will try to manipulate her into this. I think Maddie will flirt a bit, Cait will try and seek salvage and vulnerability in someone, especially since she is now constantly in public's eye and needs to project hope™ and stoicism™. It will be a genuine attempt to move on — not anybody's fault she can't.
But oh god, oh goooddd i cant wait for Maddie to loose the spark in her eyes due to lesbian situationship.
#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#jayce talis#caitlyn kiramman#caitvi#Ekko#mel medarda#ambessa medarda#vi arcane#maddie nolen
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Hey, just saw your post about Veilguard - do you mind me asking what it is that put you off? Thanks!
I can start by saying I've not played it. I'm not going to at this point. But basically, every cutscene and dialogue option and plot point I've watched. And for those of you that don't remember I was hugely critical of Inquisition despite my love for it. And I downright hated Trespasser. So this shouldnt be shocking.
And its a lot of stuff I dont like. I can make a short list of major things below, obvious spoilers.
Please dont read this if it will make you angry okay? This is a lot of angry ranting.
1. I said this with inquisition and trespassers but veilguard seals my hatred for the decision to center the entire plot of ripping apart the dalish culture and religion. I'm sorry I just don't think this is compelling. It's icky to create an oppressed and marginalized race with parallels to most indigenous cultures in the real world, and basically call them wrong and stupid for clinging to their culture and history. I don't care that validating the Enuvanris existance means also invalidating the maker and the tevinter reiligions too, or even the dwarven: the game centers this narrative on the DALISH. The entire implication that its their fault all along or they sold themselves into a cult and slavery is gross. The game could have easily done this but centered it around the Maker. Andraste as the blight corrupted crazy deity or spirit whatever the fuck. Makes more sense with how much Chantry has been shoved down our throats since origins, and given how much wider spread it is after literal genocides of the dalish, qun, etc it would just mean a lot more to target the oppressors/majority religion directly. And look listen, I'm a pretty hardcore athiest and even anti thiest. I hate all religions, I find stories about dismantling religion compelling but to couch it histories of marginalized people like... its just not great. Not to mention twisting their gods into systematic greedy people or shoving their "bestest god" into a human woman and trying to make her prostheltize at me. I don't like it!
2. I get why old decisions dont matter. The world is too big, sure. I dont mind that at all, actually, even with all the problems, it gives people invested in those choices. Im happy to accept it. But then... make the actual plot less beholden to it. Why bring in cameos at all, then? Fuck man set it 50 or 80 years later. But if you cant cause everyone wants closure in the DA fandom then give us closure. If not personal closure with wardens and hawkes and etc cause its all too variant — lore closure. We arent going to talk about how darkspawn were thinking and talking? Blight was always just a random elvhen weapon? What apparent the tevinter magisters then? What about the architect? What about the idea of darkspawn becoming their own race and culture? What about the old gods themselves they were just always enuvanris? How do magisters actually feel about that? Why did those who worshipped corypheous or the black church follow Elvhen gods, their most oppressed and hated enemy aside from the qunari?
Speaking of, what about all of us who wanted to confront Minrathous and Tevine for the atrocities we've built up about it for 3 games. Slavery? Off screen solved before we get there? Dorian fixed it all? I had a heated debate with Dorian about him saying how slavery wasnt all that bad "They like being slaves!" And so many conversations with Fenris about how horrible it is. Rape and murder and submission? We don't as players get to finally confront that?
How about red lyrium being sentient. How about it being a tool the elvhen then used to murder titans, but not its alive and unstoppable? How can anything be unblighted? Because plot?
What of the calling? What of it really? What of those in The Calling who were unblighted? nothing?
Not even a deep conversation about the murky ethics of liberation/slavery when it comes to the Antivan crows stealing children? I'm to forget that?
How about anything all to do with the Qun? How about that burnt in memory I have of Saarabas immolating himself in service to not just the system of his culture but his belief in his faith. We're writing him off as a terrorist and not as an example of the Qun? Lets be really real; they have been retconning the Qun every game till now them being a fully gender and sexual accepting society.
How about the changes of mages vs templars if and maybe they walk free now? As if that entire conflict wasnt the brewing boiling point for three games?
What about the elvhen rebellion they so rightly started after centuries or murder and racism? Can we stop pretending that rebellion isnt an act of violence and has to be? Can we stop erasing the idea that systemical upheavel can be anything other than radical? Hello? Anders is one the phone asking for you?
How about that ending, the veil isn't even torn? Spirits don't walk the earth as intended. Why not solas' plan? Why not restore order. Why not join or dissuade him as he asked us to in trespasser?
It just all feels washed off, Thedas. I'm allowed to be angry and upset that they spanned all of these topics and asked me to engage with them on a deep ethical and moral grounds only to never mention them again. I dont think making your player base feel stupid for caring is great.
3. On personal levels, Solas has been ooc since trepasser. And frankly, the explanation of his relationship with Mythal is disgusting. Made the first slave and turned from his true nature into a tool of war—and reaffirming his subservance by making it that only Mythal could stop him? How is that not a toxic dynamic, and they fram it as loving and romantic? Imagine them trying that Fenris who can only be talked down by Danerous. Come on. It should have been Lavellan — or it really should have been not at all. Let him. The devs want to destory Thedas and start over? Let solas reset time and recreate the earth and tear is all down and erase most of the history. Do it you cowards. Give me an unrecognizable DA5 where spirits and mages rule and the elvhen thrive and war with each other. Give me slaved humans and a topsy turvy all that changes remains the same reality. Why not if you want to illuminti titan everything anyway.
4. I dont believe in the veilguard, I should have a choice not to. I should have a reason to care about it or my companions or fewl some sort of reason we must all work together aside from "theyre adorable". All the other games you had companion parties in organic and believable ways. Rook is leader cause.... ? What if I dont want to be? At least my Dalish inquisitor fought tooth and nail not to be called a christian messiah. Hawke had FRIENDS. And the warden found those who knew what a blight meant. And many of all of us disagreed. Vivianne got not sympathy from me. Why should Neve? Fenris will leave your party if you waste your time when the Magister comes to town. I dont want to coddle Harding about her stupid chantry. I do not to talk to Lucanis happily about the crows. Maybe I dont want to be friendly all the time. Maybe I hate everything Bellara is doing. Or taash.
5. The writing was on the wall in inquistion hoenestly. What with Iron bull letting me decide is he mass murders his found family or not. But jesus these new companions are like 10 yrs old. I don't know you decide. Your a fucking adult. I cant take a single one of them seriously. Even Sera screamed and yelled at me if I challenged her. Solas and I almost broke up mutiple times arguing about tradition and purpose or that damn Mythal well (again and no wonder he would object to doing anything akin to being emslaved by her, only to submit himself in this game. As if the well mattered at all. As if morrigan matters at all.) I just don't feel as though I'm bonding with anyone, I'm babysitting. Im being told what a great person I am that I can teach everyone elementary school behaviorial learning. I dont want to, I dont even want to be "good".
6. Petty stuff:
I hate the art style both in the UI and the models. I hate it. And the expressions are so poor compared even to Da2.
I hate all the armors. Everyone is bulky. Hate it.
Ugly combat.
Cant control or walk around as my companions and try out other classes.
CC cant change eyes or facial structure much so all rooks heads look the same and kinda... everyone looks like a dwarf. Sorry. Imo, imo, every rook I have seen looks like a dwarf.
Dont like the music.
Dragons are ugly.
Morrigans outfit makes it look like she has 4 titties.
I hate this elvhen "steampunk" tech when so much of their magic was shown to be earthen and mystic. Dumb. No explanation as why it would become this way it just is now.
Blood magic erasure cause the devs are scared of us being cool I guess.
I hate the humor. Every joke doesnt land for me. And there are simply too many.
#in the long run i just think they dropped the ball#the romances arent steamy#the coversations are dull#the politics are akin to a 6th grade civis class
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Hi how are you doing
im fine but i have so much to do
#have to do conf work#then do my part of a group assignment#study for midsems#prepare group ppt which is in dec#submit my project for innovation contest#write the report for my comm service club#find papers for the review paper im writing under a prof#apply for event head position in our college cfest#complete journals#had to stop and think for 5 minutes to see if im forgetting something lol#at this point i dont even want to remember
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they should just go watch a fucking play, I can't.
#yeah he wants to go watch a play with you house#the subtext is just text at this point#i dont even remember what episode this was from#happens every episode at this point#house md#hilson#james wilson#greg house#hate crimes md
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Yeah shes PRETTY cute. I font know i never looked at these people til recently. Not everyome cates eh. I font know i saw yhrm the news but i hate the news and dont really pay attention cause its all bullshit just about. They leave put the fine print everytime or theulyre just dumb. Or evil even worse. See me bury them all Princess? God sheds no tears for man. Remember that. Angrls maybe God never. Yiu prople fuckneith me wstch whst i fo yo yhose smericans. Ahh yhrulyre stupid. And weak. And easily defeated i epuld jnoe i gorget hpw many times i beat their asses. Have a nice BURN mother fuckers. Ha ha ha i like laughing in yheor face but they cant fo yhe same at this point. Yheyre fuckn terrified of me they should be i eould be too i know me. I am the only one who scares me Catnerine. Youd see that even sfter five monutes i font feel pain like everyone else. I dont use it like rveryone else either. Uiu have a cute family. Youre lucky people worrybsbput rvetything having ly oen family never eotked put for me do youre lucky. I font want it to work out. The child eould be doomed like everyone rlse here. Im not that cruel.
I know this isn’t the first time we’ve seen the Princess of Wales since she announced her cancer treatment and its completion, but it’s the first time I feel she’s truly returned to public life. And what a beautiful way to come back. – Isa
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one of the things that fascinate me about thawne: yes, he CAN be normal with kids! surprisingly normal!
((not at all times, though. his mental illness still spills through and as usual he, in trying to manipulate or hurt others, spits out at them the exact stuff that would hurt him (or have in his childhood/barry's rejection interpretation) the most in the first place lmao))
but at the same time. his like second instinct when doing his bullshit is FUCK THEM (as) KIDS
(and, well. whatever this classifies as)
#whats wrong with him. seriously. he loves picking fights with literal children So Much#AND NONE OF THEM WITH WALLY ON THE MATTER OF BEING THE BIGGEST FLASH FAN. HOW DID THAT NEVER HAPPEN#about the middle page. honestly i DIDNT remember he is a Jerk in that way too until i checked his interactions with bart for this post#this man officially should not be allowed near children as a mentor.#just straight up drops ALL his insecurities on a poor kid in trying to make him feel ashamed. NO breaking the abuse cycle for this bad boy#the only thing he doesnt say is the direct 'you are a disappointment' altho the message is still the same 💀💀💀💀💀💀#AND I BET HES HELLA PROUD OF THAT. I MEAN CONSIDERING THIS FACT IG HE DOES TRY TO BE BETTER THAN HIS PARENTS. SOMEWHAT.#and omg he formulates his point like in problem based learning (leading the child to making the correct conclusion themselves)#im dying. professor to the fucking core.#and the way he feels the need to bring up flash facts in his appeal?? EO YOURE SO HOPELESS. THIS IS 100% HOW BART SAW HIM THROUGH#and god knows what he told thad promising to get him out of the speed force if he fought barry there and whether he was going to fulfill it#and do you even IMAGINE how FUCKED barry's mental condition would be growing up if thawne fulfilled his button threat#and i really REALLY wonder about the tornado twins and their relationship with 'uncle eobard' but that will be a separate post#he doesnt know any other way tho. and he might be actually mad at bart for not supporting his every action as The Flash#like. he tries to play family but the second they question he just goes WHATEVER. I DONT NEED IT. FLASH OF MY VISION RUNS ALONE#his problem is that he just wants attention. he doesnt see family/heroing for what 'its really about' or downsides that may come with them#everything is so idealized in his head. and the moment he faces reality with its complications the concept immediately gets antagonized.#and then he reconsiders and changes the conditions but fails each time never realizing the problem is his mindset and not everything else#black white at its finest yall#and man. RELATABLE.#also WHY is he standing LIKE A STATUE when appearing in front of bart????😭😭😭😭#poor museum rat has no idea what heroes in real life stand like#eobard thawne#professor zoom#reverse flash#the reverse flash#bart allen#the flash#dc
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There are genuinely people online that instead of actually bringing people to the left, at this point, would prefer that anyone who was previously not on the left but who tries to be *stays* outside of the left, because i guess its just easier to comprehend when the world is put into little shitty boxes you labeled for them instead of actually thinking for once and having the nuance to understand them. Like thats wild to me that theres people who would prefer you not be on the left or not try to be. Yall GENUINELY do not care about advocating for your side politically in any capacity. Its LITERALLY just a clique you've found yourself in. And theres nothing progressive about that or being exclusive, wtf do you think this shit is, a night club? Grow the fuck up, honestly.
#A whole lot easier to consistently point and laugh at the same person than to ever encourage them to change i guess#yall are weak#Yall wont get us anywhere and actively hurt progressive causes#And the worst part is most of the ppl like this are on tumblr and a lot of the people on tumblr absolutely suck as human beings#and never want to do anything about it either partially because they think theyre above any form of therapy 🙄#Idk. maybe its a comfort thing. Like things have to be exactly how they remembered them the day before or else they'll idk lose their mind#Like some of yall would prefer the world stays black and white and thats sad#Lets be honest. What it really is is you dont want to have to feel any potential guilt for treating someone as if theyre just#discardable trash when they werent.#Bc ur just oooohhh soooo perfeccctttt and it just fucks with your self perception when someone even inadvertently suggests#you did something wrong lmao.#yall wont survive in this world
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being a pjo library girly who doesn't actually own the books mean that anytime you want to re-read a page in the books, you need to go online to read it.
#in my defence books are expensive okay. buying the pjo and hoo sets together is even more expensive 😀#my parents already know that I've read the books before so they'd be like 'why buy books that you've already read before??'#LIKE YOU DONT GET IT DAD#I want to read jasons povs at random points of the day whenever I want okay :<#I still remember that I annotated 'LOL relatable jason' w a pencil on the page where jason was worried that midas's undies would show up 😭#to the person who has probably borrowed the exact same book I wrote that in. I can explain I swear-#s#pjo#pjo fandom#percy jackson#pjo series#pjo hoo#pjo hoo toa
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Literally 90% of the issues with the moclan episodes stem from the fact that they never bothered to actually figure out how any of it worked in the begining.
Due to the shows starting roots of being a parody, they didnt super put in a lot of work into the actual worldbuilding until waaaay later. Moclans were just "haha what if there were klingons but they were all gay?". And then they never bothered to actually do any work on asking how that would actually develop and function.
Like why do moclans even have females? They obviously dont need them to reproduce, why wouldnt their evolution have completely bred them out by now? And moreover since they do exist, how does that tie in to moclan reproduction since females arent a nessecary part of it? How did the male biology evolve to accomodate birth, and for that matter the production and laying of eggs (another thing they did for a giggle without bothering to consider the implications biologically).
This offers even more questions when you remember the one fact OP didnt mention in this (which i dont blame them for because its barely focused on in the show either) But Klyden was also born female, much like their child topa. The whole reason Klyden freaks out about Topa being born female isnt just because hes a regressive conservative dicklord, but because he doesnt want topa to experience the shame he did of being born female. Which not only makes this messaging even more convoluted, but also begs the question of "how did he impregnate Bortus then?" And yea sure the answer could easily be that the whole species is actually intersex but thats literally never mentioned or even insinuated (likely because the writers know jack shit about it)
The whole problem is that the entire thing started as a poorly thought out joke that they then tried to turn into hamfisted serious reflection on current issues. Which they cant actually accurately do because they slapped it on the "what if being cis was illegal!" Joke Characters who fuck up the whole message because no one bothered to actually ask how any of this would actually work. And by the time it became actually relevant we were 3 seasons in.
At any point in the 3 seasons of run time they couldve taken the time to hash this out in a way that made more sense. Or they couldve just made up an entirely new race instead of constantly slapping all their "gender issues episodes" around moclan society. Literally any episode that has to do with sexuality or gender always revolves around moclus, despite every other socio-political issue they talk about having a whole new planet made around it.
For fucks sake they gave the "what if facebook ruled the world" planet TWO episodes!! They had a whole episode dedicated to Astrology Planet!
Just make another transphobic planet to clean up instead of stumbling over your season one joke characters!
Let's talk about The Orville.
Alright. My STEMbo ass needs to have a certified Media Analysis Moment, and I hope this doesn’t all come across as too dumb or missing something obvious.
Let’s talk about the TV show, The Orville.
Genuinely. And I do mean genuinely.
What the actual fuck is Topa’s storyline saying about transgender issues?
I watched seasons 1 and 2 of The Orville a long time ago, and I’m now working my way through season 3. I just finished s3e5, “A Tale of Two Topas”. I know there’s more to come about it, but I’m just kinda venting up to that point.
I need some kind of “cis eye for the queer guy” to analyze clumsily written “ally” media- I’m far less concerned about what the showrunners tried to write, than I am about how it comes across on the screen to the "typical" cis audience. The storyline is treated with bewildering confidence in a way that doesn’t seem to realize how fucking weird its messaging is, and I feel like the fact that its so contradictory is something the show itself is trying to hide.
Gimme a moment to collect my thoughts, I’m typing out a lot of shit. I'll post a ramble as a reblog to this.
#the orville#the orville new horizons#transgender#gender#lgbt#queer#trans#I do like this show but i wish seth had started a different one for his serious shit#Because trying to mix your serious messages with family guy humour does not fucking work#I realize this maybe doesnt add as much to the conversation as i thought it would but i still need to get it off my chest
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does anyone else enter a fandom space and like. see a couple people and immediately target them with the endgoal of becoming their friend/mutual . does that make sense. like you see someone active in a tag with Good Opinions and ur like Ohhh. okay. yes. they will be my mutual. like not a "i hope we become mutuals!" no we WILL be mutuals. we will. this isn't a hope its a I Know It Will Happen . I Have My Ways
#mel roars#did it with hs. did it with md. now im doing it with mp#dont even remember who i specifically wanted to befriend in md tumblr at this point but i know i got EVERYONE on my list down#mp fuckers u r not safe NEVER underestimate my power of friendship
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so. this scene has been talked about a lot:
I think this scene is a really interesting example of the criminal minds writers giving tiny pieces of character backstories that are never elaborated upon, (or, more broadly, forgetting early established character details) because unlike a lot of examples where lines are said and immediately forgotten about, I do think this revelation informs a lot of Hotch's character. I'm not necessarily saying that the writers always had it in mind when writing Hotch that he experienced childhood abuse, but I do feel like you can see the ways in which he was affected. I don't know—this made more sense in my head, but it feels a little less forgotten about and a little less thrown in than some other examples. I think a big difference between this scene and some later ones is that:
The trauma happened pre-series
and
It was established in the first season.
criminal minds isn't great at letting their characters be affected by their in-series trauma for more than a few episodes (and then maybe it'll come up once or twice down the line because the writers remembered it happened) and a lot of later instances* of characters being revealed to have some major pre-series trauma suffer because the impact it would have reasonably had on them isn't consistent with earlier portrayals and sometimes even contradicts established information.
not that it can't be interesting to look at those earlier portrayals of their characters with the backstory that is added later. again, this all made more sense in my head: essentially, the reason i think this feels different to me is that the writers knew when they started writing hotch that he was abused as a child, while other characters who have traumatic backstories revealed have those backstories added much later, and so the writers have a not-great choice between showing the effects their trauma had on them when there was no sign of it earlier, or moving on with their character as if none of it ever happened.
*i'd like to quickly establish that i'm not talking about morgan here. that was also a pretty early reveal and feels consistent enough with early characterization that i wouldn't be shocked if the idea was first floated while season one was being written
#as for how i think hotch's childhood abuse actually affected him#that would require a longer post and for me to watch more episodes so i have more evidence#but the very simple one sentence version is that i think hotch fears becoming his father#was it his biodad or stepdad? i dont remember. he had both right?#either way. if criminal minds writers were like#hey nineteen year-old canadian#for some reason we want you to cast hotch's father for a flashback#i would want the actor to look as much like thomas gibson as possible to really drive that point home#even if it WAS his stepdad#and if it was his stepdad it could fuck people up even more because instead of being told he looks like either of his biological parents#he'd constantly be told how much he looks like his unrelated abuser#man im sorry im just rambling in the tags ill shut up now#criminal minds#criminal minds rewatch#criminal minds s01e08#natural born killer#aaron hotchner#not fic#criminal minds 1x8
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the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something
#WHAT AM I DOING!!!!#i get up i go to my stupid retail job i stick labels on bags they pay me fucking thirteen bucks an hour i come home i lie on the couch#too tired to draw in too much pain to go anywhere no energy to reach out to college friends to do anything fun#no idea where the even start with getting an industry job no clue what i even WANT at this point#trying to remember what i loved so much about comics i want it BACK i HATE this#WHAT IS THE POINT!!!! WHAT DO I WANT WHERE AM I GOING!!! WHAT COMES NEXT!!!!!!#there's no clear career trajectory i can't do freelance i need structure i can't work too much i need free time#my brain doesn't work every job requires me to move across the country the irs just took fucking three hundred stupid dollars from me#my friends live in different states i can't get a job without experience i can't get experience without a job#i can't work on my portfolio with no energy and no time and i dont have any money and everything is so expensive all the time#i can't get anywhere bc i dont drive and im too stressed to think about taking driving lessons again#and WHAT DO I WANT!#THE MOST INTERESTING THING I DO EVERY WEEK IS GO TO PHYSICAL THERAPY!#I AM EXCITED EVERY WEEK FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!! WHY!!!!!!!!#anyway WHATEVER i need to go to bed#delete later#i got into spx. today. so. had to have a crisis about how i felt when i attended spx (energized. excited. a part of something. ambitious)#versus how i feel now (tired. unmotivated. kind of apathetic about art. disconnected)#i dont miss the stress of school but i miss being around other artists. ppl who speak your language and who want the same things you want#ppl who are excited abut art and that makes YOU excited about art. ppl who get you#i miss that i want that back#whatever. its 1am i gotta go shower i have an 8.5 hour shift tomorrow. wahoo. $13.50/hr lets go
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i miss horses
#horseback riding is insanely expensive in big cities though#idk if ive talked about it here but i did do horseback riding for i think six? or seven years? something like that#i was super lucky i got to do that bc i was able to get my equipment 2nd hand and#and my mom had 2 jobs and she thinks every kid should have at least one sports hobby and#she knew how much being able to do riding would mean to me so she made it happen and#it did so good for me so i'm very thankful#*did so much good#man i was in such a good shape when i still did riding. by good shape i mean great ass.#anyways i was even pretty good at it. the coach always wabted me to compete but i was like#''hmm no ♡'' bc i didnt want to have to learn and remember what to do at which point#i do sometimes think about what if i started competing#probably not much bc idk if it works with someone elses horse but hey i could have gotten ribbons#anyways i miss it#i dont think i could even get on a horse anymore. i need to start stretching regularly#also im probably too heavy to ride a lot of horses#but i want to brush a horse so bad rn#pretty recently after i stopped riding someone asked me if i did ride bc they could see it on the way i carry myself#which was interesting but i get what they meant#sigh my posture was so much better too#also im kinda scare i wouldnt bounce back from falling like i did when i was younger#it's a miracle i never broke anything or worse#leevi talks
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